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Breaking News!!!

Wait...  WHAT??? 

We're Back???  WTF?

Yes, kids.  We're back.  The sentence was reduced due to "good behavior".  (Bob's still MIA.  Good behavior was never his strong suit.)  But don't get too excited about this little update.  Let's just take this one day at a time...

Some serious shit has gone down since we last put pen to paper on this stupid site.  And I'm not talking about WinoBob's run in with the law.  I'm talking about serious, crazy, world-changing shit.  Crazy towel-heads shooting up French newspapers, burning and pillaging villages, kidnapping schoolgirls, beheading journalists.  Malaysian airliners dropping like flies.  People shooting cops for no reason.  WTF is going on, people???  This has got to stop!!! 

I'd like to say that all this craziness kept me from updating this site for the past couple of...  years.  But, while I may have been distracted, crazy shit did not directly cause me to lose my way.  Here's a couple of tidbits to consider when you cuss about the lack of updates on this site. 

  1. About a year ago, they moved our website to a "new server".  I don't know why.  The old server seemed to work just fine.

  2. When they moved the site, they changed the Username for the FTP function.  And they didn't tell me.  Despite my repeated frequent occasional singular attempt to update the site, I was denied.  (Maybe they told me that username was changing and maybe I wasn't listening, I don't know.  There's a lot of shit going on in this world, remember?)

  3. I now have 8 guitars.  And they don't just play themselves, damn it...

Oh, yeah.  One more thing.  Some asshole contacted me a while back and DEMANDED that I take down the photoshopped image of his WinoBabe boss.  Or his girlfriend.  Maybe his daughter, I don't know.  I wasn't listening.  What did I do, you ask?  Without a moment's hesitation, I ignored him!!!  Yeah, that's right.  I showed him.  Didn't even respond.  He never saw that coming... 

For the record, the correct way to request that a WinoBabe be retired is with a simple email that reads something like this...

Dear WinoJohn,

Dude!  Awesome work on insert name here.  Making her WBotM was sheer brilliance.  You are certainly a wise and talented wino.  However, while insert name here is honored and flattered, she is also mildly intimidated by the smokin' hot body on to which you grafted her head.  Do you think you could maybe take it down?  I'm sure that if I tell her that I managed to have the picture removed, I'd have a good shot to hit that!!!

Thanks for helping out a fellow wino!



No need to get all crazy on me.

January 16, 2015 
                Looking for old Breaking News?  click here...

NEW!  Winery of the Month

Someone on the staff of WinoStuff is determined to keep this site updated.  (That would be someone without a new guitar!!!)  Therefore, so that Cockburns doesn't remain Winery of the Month for half the year, we bring you a NEW WotM award winner for February.  This month, we honor a producer that is making a nice white port because once you go white, you never go...  wait... what?  That doesn't sound right...

Anyway, WinoBob had enough Cockburn during January to last a lifetime.  Or so he told me.  I don't know anything about his cockburn.  Nonetheless...  here's Bob's award justification:

February is the shortest month of the year that is why I am taking this opportunity to call out a white port wine as the wine of the month.  I love Fonseca’s Tawny Port but for February I will be enjoying Fonseca Siroco.


In most countries, Ports is traditionally enjoyed at the end of the meal.  The exception is white Port, especially the drier style that makes an excellent aperitif.  It is a blend of classic white Port grape varieties, predominantly Malvasia Fina with smaller proportions of Gouveio, Viosinho, Rabigato and Arinto, grown on the cooler, higher vineyards of the Douro Valley. To achieve its crisp dry finish, the wine is allowed to ferment for longer than other styles of Port before it is fortified. Ageing in small oak vats gives Siroco its smoothness as well as its attractive ripe fruit flavors and delicate nuttiness.

So don’t be stuck thinking that port is just for after dinner.  Go white before you eat.  Just so you know, I will be returning to the red side of Fonseca later this year.

Congratulations, Fonseca.  I would raise a glass in your honor but I'm a little busy right now.  Playing my NEW GUITAR!

February 2013

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New Feature!
WinoBabe of the Month!

Since our last WBotM was up for like a year and a half (even longer than our favorite WinoBabe, Lindsey), I figure it is time to bestow this great honor unto another babe, female winemaker.  I searched and found someone described as "passionate, energetic and professional in her duties".  Plus she has the reigns at Château Lanessan in Haut-Medoc near Bordeaux,  one of those discreet and high quality, family-owned estates you hear about from time to time. 

It gives me great pleasure to name Paz Espejo our WinoBabe of the Month.  Paz is a young Spanish winemaker with a  degree in oenology.  She worked in both Spain and Italy before settling in Bordeaux.

Although this isn’t the year of Bordeaux, her Spanish roots made her a great choice for this month’s WBOTM. 

 Congrats, Paz! 

 ...click here for the
   WinoBabe Hall of Fame  


Despite the recent Supreme Court ruling, there is still work to be done!


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