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It was a hot and sweaty day…

It was a hot and sweaty day; haze seeping over hills, under clouds, often blacking out the sight of the Met Life Snoopy balloon and who better to create a lead-in to a parody about Bulwer-Lytton, other than Snoopy, a cartoonish creation resembling a beagle but sometimes more creative than a dog famous for howling at the moon.  Alas, Bulwer-Lytton never knew a phrase he couldn’t turn; similar to Wino Bob never knowing a bottle he couldn’t pour.

My brother-in-law and famous publisher of called on Friday morning to invite Wino Sharon and I to the PGA golf tourney at Baltusrol.  Never being one to miss an opportunity to sip exotic wines at the Wino John estate on the mountain, we said yes and headed up to New Jersey.

I took the opportunity to call Wino John at his capitalist techno dweeb job and asked him if he had received tickets to a corporate tent so that we could find a respite from the heat wave encompassing most of the East Coast but particularly centered on Summit, New Jersey and environs.  WJ said that his buddy had given him grounds admission tickets so we would have to rough it.  I told Wino John that I was going to work on something else, if he didn’t mind.

All of the WinoStuff columnists have specialties, and golf connections are one of mine.  I picked up the phone and placed a call to a friend of mine with the PGA (We’ll call him Wino John Doe to protect his identity).  Wino JD returned the call from the PGA tent and I asked if there was a chance that he could get us an upgrade on our tickets to gain admission and air conditioning to one of his corporate partners.  “No problem,” said Wino JD.  “When you enter the grounds, go to the guard keeping the riff raff out of our village and call my tent.  We’ll send someone down there to pick you up.”

We drove up to the WJ estate on Friday night.  WJ broke out the Colgin Herb Lamb vertical for the guys (and the gals drank some vegetal Chardonnay which couldn’t hold a candle to Herb Lamb).  It was a great way to start the weekend!

The rest of the story is pretty good too!  The next day we took the NJ Transit train to Summit and grabbed the shuttle bus to the golf course.  We roamed the grounds at Baltusrol, taking in the sights and a few of our favorite golfers.  Moving over to the tent complex, we made the call to Wino JD and received a visit from a nice young lady who escorted us up to the PGA Chalet.  We received an upgraded grounds pass and a wrist bracelet to allow us admission into the Chalet for the rest of the day.  What a deal!  Watching live golf in person, taking a break from the heat and sitting in the Chalet sipping great wine and eating crabcakes and tenderloin.  Oh, and did I forget to mention, eating Dove Bars whenever we were overheated from walking on the course?

New Jersey has some monumental places; golf courses like Baltusrol and Pine Valley (my other favorite golf course to visit) and individual icons like our own WinoBob.  Wino John and I did not run into Wino Bob at the PGA, but we think we saw him hawking bottles of water at a roadside stand on the way into the event.  It was a little odd, seeing that stick figure dressed in dark clothes, stained by perspiration, holding an icy cold bottle of water in one hand and a Reidel glass stained by Cabernet in the other.  However, the sign “buy a water and help my wine habit” was a dead giveaway.  WB, how much did you take in today?

Wino Wally
August 13, 2005


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